come fly with me
In theory, I ought to have been posting from the very comfortable Sheraton Skyline at Heathrow airport, having enjoyed a relaxing journey via the capital on my old friend the National Express, possibly managing to catch up on some reading having as ever abandoned my earlier idea of watching DVDs whilst briskly responding to correspondence and possibly writing my regular entry here – the seats are really not capacious enough to set up a mobile office, even though the instinct to gleefully mark out one’s temporary territory with bottled water, mobile phones and family bags of Maltesers is persuasive indeed.
I usually travel sans laptop, preferring (for reasons long forgotten) to rely on my trusty (and increasingly battered) PDA, despite the miniscule screen, breathtaking battery consumption and infuriating typing options (miniature keyboard vs. tiny pointy stick). Plus hotel wi-fi is disgustingly, tooth-achingly expensive (although in the Sheraton’s case, the defibrillators would have already been on their way to aid anyone who had mistakenly glanced at the prices on the room service menu).
Instead, following a boisterous Friday night and the subsequently missing of my planned transport I found myself dashing across to Heathrow like a thing possessed, arriving dishevelled, flustered and not a little grubby – fortunately my charming consort for the evening had experienced logistical problems of his own and kindly moved our meeting back a little; without this I would have been decidedly ruffled and had nowhere near enough time to select appropriate lingerie and corsetry, let alone to straighten my seams properly. As it was, the looming crises were averted and a delightful time was had by all, although I still do not believe I will ever be able to walk gracefully in thigh boots with 7″ heels.
Since returning home this week I have been touched to find out that a new acquaintance of more rural origins has taken it upon himself to immortalise my name in the form of a beautiful newborn calf. I hope to follow Amy’s progress and possibly obtain a photograph – she may have pride of place on the mantlepiece, although an actual meeting would clearly not be practical (despite the odd occasion where over-enthusiastic companions have made a diabolical mess, largely with plenty of help and encouragement from me). And as many of you know, I do not drive (for reasons mainly of temperament), so our blossoming relationship will sadly have to remain at a distance.
To anyone who was wondering, I am still planning a visit to Edinburgh later on this month, and possibly even a trip back to Ireland following an enticing although admittedly very preliminary enquiry. An opportunistic check has shown me that flights are available through Ryanair for £5 each with no taxes, so a trip might be on the cards regardless – surely it would be churlish not to go at those prices! I will keep you informed as ever. However, I do not plan any trips for the coming seven days, so anyone who would like to come and while away a pleasant hour or two in my purpose-made-and-nearly-ready bedroom (or living room, wet room or once memorably, the hallway) is more than welcome to get in touch!
I have been delighted to find my diary filling up more and more quickly now the general post-Christmas malaise has passed and would recommend to all callers that they contact me at least a day or two in advance to avoid disappointment on both sides. Availability for next week is already going, going…….
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